Wednesday, August 06, 2008


Is anybody still reading this blog? If so, what's wrong with you? I'm the worst blogger EVER! But thank you. :D

I want to yell today...and possibly curse. Want to know where I've been?
I'll tell ya where...

Does anyone have any encouragement for a chick ALREADY wanting to quit working out? I pay $20 per session with a personal trainer (pretty cheap admittedly) and have been about 7 times. For that much money as well as tasty food deprivation, I had hoped to look like a movie star by now. I know! I know! It takes time. It took 9 months to put the weight on, I can't take it off in 3 weeks. Whatever.

I come home freaking SORE and exhausted. I did my weekly shopping last week the day after a leg work out. It hurt so badly to squat down and get things off lower shelves that I wanted to just lie there and ask someone to pull me by my arms when I wanted to go further down the aisle.

When does the added energy kick in from exercising and eating healthy? I'm tired!! And I'm so sick of calorie counting already. I figured just cutting out soft drinks and fast food would make a big difference, but I'm eating crap diet food as well. I've hardly lost any weight.

We had WHEAT spaghetti last night. FREAKIN' WHEAT SPAGHETTI!!!!!! Ironman almost barfed. He's ready for me to get back to our lazy and more tasty lifestyle, too. I'm not used to cooking every night or even eating 3 meals a day. And if I DO cook, I want it to have gravy or what's the point??? We're in TEXAS for gosh sakes! It should be fried and smothered with gravy...and possibly butter!


I'm not even close to being done complaining. I get my ass to the gym with 4 kids THREE days a week despite their growing desire to NOT go to the nursery. Lin had her heart appt. Monday, so I worked out to a video at home that day and did THREE Pilate's videos yesterday. THREE!!!!

I want to strangle my trainer. I don't think she has kids or a husband, and she's new to town. She can live at the gym if she wants. She wants to know why I'm not out walking at night (hello...105 degrees here) or making it to the gym to do cardio on my days off. She has me write down everything I eat. I've had 1 Mr. Pibb, and this is the middle of my 3rd week. She looks at my meals and keeps pointing out that same Mr. Pibb and says, "I'd like to see this cut out completely." THAT WAS LIKE THREE WEEKS AGO LADY!!!!!!!!!!!!! HOW MUCH MORE CAN I CUT OUT MR. PIBB IF I'M HAVING NONE! FREAKING NONE!!!! I HAVE NO CAFFEINE AND I'M ABOUT TO CUT SOMEONE!!!!!

So anyway, I don't completely deprive myself of chocolate. I eat cookies in the 100 calorie pack. I allow myself a cheat meal on weekends. I temporarily fell off the diet wagon a couple of times, but my calories have been drastically cut. My trainer is happy regarding my diet and even my moments of weakness. Then why aren't the pounds melting off?????

I did nothing to lose weight after my other three kids. Somehow it just eventually came off. I ate whatever I wanted. I never even looked at a gym for at least a year after my third child was born. If I got the results I wanted before with no effort, then why am I busting my butt now? The results are definitely not immediate. I guess things feel firmer, but I want the scale to reflect major weight loss which ain't happening. All that work for 1-2 pounds a week? This is going to take forever!!!!!!!!!!

I need to lose 20 more pounds to be back to pre-baby size. I honestly expected the first five or so to come off super fast. I figured the last 10 pounds would be work--which would only be as tough as what I'm doing now. THIS SUCKS! I'm SICK of maternity clothes! I don't fit in any of my regular clothes, and I refuse to buy new clothes for the size I am now. If I did that, I'd feel totally defeated.

So I think that about covers my complaints. I'm going to try to catch a nap before fixing something disgusting for dinner. Bleck. If you can muster any encouragement or advice, it would be greatly appreciated.